Satnaam ji, dandauth bandhna ji
in gurbani Guru Arjun Dev ji says the true warrior is the one who is coloured by the naam, because only that one has turned the battle inwards and overcome their own ego. So only when you become low and wash everyone;s feet in your simran (recite "haumai nahee tuhi tu satnaam") and all day long can you say you are a true warrior in the guise of a simple (innocent, not dumb) person. Your soul is simple, God is simple, love is simple, compassion is simple, a humble heart is simple, kindness to one and all is simple. When you do satnaam simran, the Truth of other people's intentions comes out - and mostly that whatever they are doing is for their own best interest, not yours, so you dont go along with their wrong maya advice
When you wash other's feet in your simran, your own anger and ego cant blind you any more from the Truth, that you still love the other person - God in you loves God in them. When we are angry and hurt, we only fill our mind with all the reasons why a relationship wont work and keep bringing up past hurts. But, when we forgive the other, then we free ourself from our own hurt and pain that is blinding us. Dont give up on the other person. Whatever you are expecting them to do for you (eg say sorry and then come running to tell you how they still love you) is also something you can do. Be true to your own heart, express those true feelings , remember the good times, and if you can overcome this breakdown, then you can overcome anything that comes in future.
Also remember the other person is also a divine soul, God is in them too, but they must also be feeling hurt, angry, betrayed etc which is also going to blind them to the Truth of you. So dont retaliate to whatever mean things they say, just apologise for causing the hurt, think well for the other person, wish well for all, Baba ji said to us "the smile on their face is my happiness". That is unconditional love, give love expect nothing in return. giving love but then expecting them to behave in a certain way or to keep them under your control is the root of all problems. Love without expectations and conditions, open your heart, and even if you get hurt, dont close up and give up on life.
Realise loving was not the wrong thing to do, but getting entangled in expectations and trying to control and posses the other person was why we suffered. There is a saying "it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all". But you never need to lose i you love unconditionally - the smile on their face i my happiness. Baba ji said "if you love someone set them free, if it was meant to be they will come back, otherwise it was never meant to be." So strive to have the bigger heart, welcome all, love all - especially those who have hurt you, give up your entanglements but dont give up loving. If you stay open hearted, the other person will cool down and realise they too can express their heart. If you react badly when others say bad stuff, then it become ego bashing heads trying to save face, win points, prove they are right etc etc as we all know too well.
God bless you.
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God bless you.
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Preeto.
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