depression

QN:

 

depression

Posted by: "shaun1154" shaunjd@tds.net   shaun1154

Mon Jul 27, 2009 5:56 pm (PDT)

Hello,
Pardon me that this is a long question. It has to do with depression.
I suffered from depression a long time ago (15 yrs), during a very traumatic period in my life. I struggled my way out of it, and for a time needed medication. I thought I had it beat. I have felt really good for a long, long time. Part of this is due to starting to practice yoga, and more recently, kundalini.
Now, though, I am finding that I can actually feel myself falling back into the pattern- lack of interest in anything, self hatred, incredible sadness, no energy, etc. I find that it almost feels like a real physical sensation in addition to being something "emotional". I do not want to start on meds again if I can help it. I have a couple of questions-
1. Could my increased awareness of what is happening to me be due to yoga? It seems to be so much more acute-
2. What can I do (in a short amount of time each day- only cause I am too sad to make myself do much) (maybe as I feel better, I can increase time?)to make me feel better- at least to help stop the incessant desire to cry? I have much to be grateful for- so no real reason to be so sad- except that I can't stand myself. short meditations, exercises, anything? I feel so badly, cause I was doing well practicing, but now I can't force myself to even practice breathing......
3. I dreamed last night that I could fly. I was flying all over, and I was so happy in my dream. Does this mean anything?
4. Can kundalini help me? Please say yes.
thanks for any help/advice.
Shaun

 

REPLY:

Sat Naam Ji,

we have a spiritual mentor - Baba Ji, he has taught us that root cause of depression is always karmic.

He said that when we are depressed it is because we have to reap what we have sown in past lives.

That we have done bad deeds to others and so now have to "walk through the valley of death for as many days

as is written for us."   But at the same time Baba Ji said that god has the most compassion for the ones

who go into depression, because they are half way to realising Him.  Because when the mind becomes depressed

it sees through the illusion that Maya (worldy distractions from god) has caused.  So the mind is "broken"

and if we get the company of a spiritual mentor (Guru / Baba )  then He holds our hand, takes our karmic pain,

eases our load, drinks our karmic poison, gives us the Eternal Blessings of Naam - Sat Naam, and guides us to the Light.

Actually the essence of the mind is Divine Light, but to realise it we often have to go into some kind of depression first.

Even Guru Nanak Dev Ji has taught us that Pain is the rememdy becuase pleasure had become the disease in which we had forgottnen the Lord.  And also to see all pain and hunger as a GIFT from God.  Baba Ji explained to us that

whenever we get pain it is for us to ask "why am i in pain?  How do I get to peace?"  When we ask that question, as you have,

then the journey of soul begins.

So please pray for the eternal Blessings of Naam, pray for the company of the Guru who will hold your arm and pull you out

of the valley of death and cut the number of days you have to walk through their down.

 

Also regarding the flying dreams, we have them too, normally after a stressful period in our life comes to an end, we have flying dream in whcih we feel free again.

 

dust of your feet

 

Harjit