Satnaam ji,
all the kids should read sister's childhood story below about her parents cruelty. Always be thankful for what good families and parents you have been given, and always pray for others in pain.
She sent it to dassan dass ji and called it a confession. But dassan dass ji said it's not actually any of her mistakes, it's the story of her parent's cruelty.
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Dandauth bandana father ji, I've started writing my confessions from childhood and onwards bit a time
and was very nervous to write it on the group so I'm sending it to you father ji, please forgive me for my sins
CONFESSIONS
Starting from my childhood days
I always use to think my parents are the worlds worst parents in the whole wide world, because they were so strict, so controlling, so over protected we were not allowed to do anything without their permission it always felt like a time bomb ticking on our heads and that it would blast anytime now if we didn't even get the words right like 'Haanji' & were not allowed to speak in english etc etc over stupid little things we were not allowed to go out to the park which was literally right outside our house opposite the door!
The green grass, the fresh air, the swings, the noises of screaming kids the fresh air was so nice to hear at THAT time but there was no point in even dreaming about it because we were not allowed to go full stop. Once mum sent me down the paper shop to get a loaf of bread which was down the road, and I went straight in to the park & thought 1 quick ride on the slide then I'll go to the shop and I went on the long slide with my eyes closed which was really nice and then went to get the bread but when I got home I got beaten up for not doing as I was told to which was go straight to the shop and mum must have been watching me through the window and since then I said to myself I'm never gonna step in to a park it must be a big sin or something'
And then even the minutes were counted how long it took us to run out of the school building when it was home time and Stupid stuff like that we were never praised at all by my parents or anyone else but always got told off.
Me, being a year older than the others was labelled the job of being a babysitter and had to help mum with every single house chores, taking away all my childhood time and because I was born a premature birth I was always been picked on by my own parents making me feel its all my fault. And being bullied at school wasn't a big deal for me anymore It didn't make much difference when others bullied at school I became use to it all and lost all my childhood days and always wanted to play games & stuff like the others
we weren't even allowed to watch t.v!
And I still remember the day when mum & dad went to a wedding taking 2 others along I was at home and when we are banned of doing something we just tend to go for it so I put on the t.v and started to watch eastenders because I had to write something for my school homework it was to write down scripts of any soap and I was trying to figure out the names of the characters but my sister grassed up on me and I got beaten up. Numerous stuff like that happened.
I'd always think how lucky other kids were at school talking about the way how their family's go out together etc etc
I never got the love from my parents and always thought it was my Fault for being a premature so now I have to face the consequences I'd always wanted my dad to put his hand over my head and assure me that we are here for you in all times good & bad I always wanted mum to hug me and say I love you and always will and that its not your fault
I always watched other kids at school chatting to their mums on parents evening as if they were friends.
I didn't want to face dad coz he was too much he was a heavy smoker and he use to punish us by marking us with cigarette burns and polluting the whole bathroom with smoke from cigarettes by closing the doors and windows and then mum & dad use to argue even she didn't like him doing that and then we had to use the bathroom like that which gave me a life term problem of being Asthmatic, it effected me more than the others and having another problem on top was hard when I had my neck problem I was coping with.
and I'm sorry but I cant forgive dad for that then I started to hate him even more and started thinking all men are like that.
Then I started college and from the beginning I always liked going to the gurdwara in fact I'm the only one in the family that went and I use to walk up a mile to go to gurdwara and I liked eating the parshaad then catch a bus to college and my tutor complained to the parents I'm always late then got told off again and the scolding never finished it kept on going for many days non stop.
Then I started collecting pennies from my bus fare money I use to get and I didn't use to put in all that for the bus then take those pennies to the gurdwara to buy some pershaad because I didn't know I was acting like a kid I got away for about a week then got caught by the bus driver to put in the fare properly
I didn't know because no one explained but didn't like to do so I thought we had to buy pershaad by dropping pennies in to the golak at that time because no one said anything because I was the only one going to gurdwara at the time.
And now I still have the child inside me that I have to satisfy by playing games in the evenings I get my I.pod out and have to have a few games, like racing games, I have to watch some t.v I use to sit and watch t.v all weekend after doing simran but since I started going to sangat I've reduced it to only 2 hours in the evening because it also gives me company being alone.
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Gur Preeto: But in Baljit's pain she has found her guru and got naam. So always be thankful you didn't have to go thru so much pain to find your guru and get naam, that you got it in childhood . So this is why we say to you young people, you have been given diamonds of naam and guru without much efforts in this life (your good earnings from past lives) but your danger is that you don't value this diamond because you got it so easily. So you don't keep satnaam close to your heart at all times, you forget to do what your guru tells you all the time. And then the five demons will rob you of this naam amrit diamond because you were careless. God bless all.
Careless... Cared less about satnaam diamond than you did about worldly comforts. In the end God gives you what we all want deep down, and if it's maya desires then naam gurparsaad is lost. JO mangay takur soee soee DEVAY.
Dandauth bandhna to God in all.
